


the world is better backwards (and i could never miss what has never existed)

by majesdane



Category: Skins (UK)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-24
Updated: 2011-03-24
Packaged: 2017-12-06 09:53:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/734340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/majesdane/pseuds/majesdane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU. <i>"Oh, why rebuke she who loves you so?</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	the world is better backwards (and i could never miss what has never existed)

**Author's Note:**

> Based off the movie _Were the World Mine_.

my ear should catch your voice, my eye your eye / my tongue  
should catch your tongue's sweet melody / were the world mine

\--  _a midsummer night's dream_ , william shakespeare

  
  
  
  
  
The last thing she remembered was getting smacked in the face with a football.  
  
Emily had always hated forced physical education, hated it even more because she was so shit at everything they did -- which was usually break up into small teams to play footie until the hour was up -- and Katie hardly ever participated, which was something that annoyed Emily all the further. Her sister usually spent the better part of the block standing off to the side and gossiping with her friends, who were invariably almost always on the same team.   
  
So Katie had been giggling and casting flirtatious looks in the direction of a group of boys that were a year ahead and were visiting from another school, and Emily'd been too busy sulking over the fact that Katie'd left her at home  _again_  earlier that morning and how it was still damp out from last night's rain, making it seem colder than it really was. And that's when one of the girls from the other team had kicked the ball clear across the field and she'd gotten slammed in the face with it.  
  
She'd fallen to the ground with a less than soft sounding  _thud_ , cutting her elbow on a rock in the process and getting a right bruise on her leg. "Fuck," she'd murmured, trying to sit up, the world spinning. Her head hurt like hell; her vision swam and for a moment she felt like she was going to swoon. It passed a second later, replaced by an even stronger urge to toss, her stomach lurching unfortunately.  
  
It didn't help that Katie was standing over her a minute later, leering at her. "Jesus Christ, Ems," she snorted, smirking. "Could you  _be_  any more useless? You can't even manage to play a game of footie without bollocking things up. Fucking hell."  
  
"Fuck off, Katie."  
  
"Whatever." Katie'd stalked off without offering a hand to help Emily up, returning to her friends, who were stood about staring at Emily and not even trying to hide their amusement at the whole ordeal. Emily felt herself flush and glanced away quickly.  
  
Up-herself cunt, Emily thought bitterly about Katie, pushing herself up into a standing position, brushing herself off sub-consciously. A few moments later the class instructor came over and asked how she was doing; aside from the bit of blood on her elbow and the giant bruise on her right cheek from getting hit in the face, she was all right. She wandered off to the side of the pitch, still feeling rather dizzy.  
  
"What's the matter, Ems?" Katie said as she passed her sitting against the fence, the gym block over. "Don't fancy playing with balls?"  
  
The girls behind her sniggered at that and Emily ducked her head in embarrassment, balling her hands into fists and digging her nails into her palms. She opened her mouth to speak, but then thought the better of it; there was no need to encourage Katie. Instead, she opted to glare up angrily at Katie, who smirked and tossed her hair.  
  
"She's a cunt," Effy told her later, standing by her locker while Emily emptied her books out into her bag.   
  
Emily offered her a weak smile. "Thanks," she said, shutting her locker with a sharp  _click_. "But that doesn't really help me much, does it? Fucking hell, I liked things better when she just wasn't speaking to me. At least then it was easier to ignore her."  
  
They walked together to their Literature class.   
  
Emily'd settled into her seat and was reaching into her bag for her notebook when a pair of feet appeared in her line of vision. She started, eyes scaling long pale legs and short plaid skirt only to come face to face with a pair of gray-blue eyes. "Oh."  
  
"Hey," Naomi Campbell said. "I saw you get hit during our physical education block."  
  
Emily felt her face and neck grow hot. "Oh," she said again, flustered, in part because she was embarrassed and in part because Naomi fucking Campbell was talking to her. Emily gaped at her. Naomi waited patiently. "R-right," Emily finally managed, feeling her face grow even hotter. "Well, uh, don't worry about it. I'm fine."  
  
"I figured," Naomi told her casually, brushing her fringe away from her eyes. "But, you know, I just thought I'd come, see how you were."  
  
Why, Emily thought. She'd gone to school with Naomi Campbell almost her entire life and she couldn't remember the girl ever saying more than five words to her the entire time. All she knew about Naomi was that she occasionally hung around with Katie and that she was on the school's hockey team. Their star player, to be precise. The previous year, she'd scored twenty goals during the season, beating out the school's previously standing record.  
  
She was also well fit in the short navy blue and gray plaid skirt that was part of their school kit, especially with those long legs of hers. Emily had spent many classes in the past few years staring at the back of Naomi's head and daydreaming. But Emily knew two other things: the first was that Naomi Campbell was as straight as they came. The second was that she was currently dating a popular boy from another school, Freddie McClair. Emily had seen them before, sometimes. He came sometimes to watch Naomi at hockey practice and Katie had mentioned more than once how fit she thought he was, much to Emily's chagrin.  
  
Whatever flights of fancy Emily had regarding herself and Naomi, she knew that they were just that. Lovely daydreams that would never come true.  
  
The teacher clearing her throat at the front of the class startled Emily out of her thoughts. Naomi said, "See you 'round, then," and headed back over to her seat on the other side of the classroom.   
  
"Today," the teacher said, leaning against the front of her desk with her arms crossed in front of her, "We're going to be discussing Shakespeare's  _A Midsummer Night's Dream_."   
  
There was a collective groan throughout the class. Emily sighed and flipped open her notebook to the first blank page, as the teacher passed out dog-eared copies of the play. Upon opening hers, Emily saw that the book had previously been owned by a one Michelle Richardson. She'd written her name along the top corner of the inside cover flap, in large, swooping letters. Emily dug a pen out of her bag and crossed the name out; underneath that she wrote  _Emily Fitch_  in small blue print.  
  
As the professor droned on about looking for symbolism and meaning and everything else that no one in class was actually paying attention to, Emily thumbed through her worn-out copy, skimming through lines and glancing at the faded highlighted lines in the book. On her right, she heard Katie make a snide remark about something the professor had just said and the girls around her erupted into a fit of smothered giggles. Emily glanced over at Katie, who smirked at her and leaned forward to whisper something in a girl's ear; Emily rolled her eyes and turned her eyes back to the front of the class, making a half-hearted attempt at taking notes.  
  
The class dragged on and eventually Emily found herself paying less and less attention. Across the room, Naomi was sitting at her desk with a look of rapt attention on her face. Emily watched as Naomi crossed and un-crossed her legs under her desk, the way the skirt fell around her thighs. It was only several long minutes later when Emily finally realized she was staring; she looked back down at the notes on her desk, tried to focus on anything else  _but_  Naomi.  
  
She still couldn't understand why Naomi had come up to her before class. What did Naomi care? She'd never made an attempt to be friends before, and the times Emily'd seen her with Katie, Naomi had pretty much ignored her. She pulled her phone out under her desk and texted Effy as much. The response (and accompanying knowing look) came a moment later:  _maybe she fancies you._  
  
Emily snorted; Katie leaned over and elbowed her in the side, glaring at her.  
  
 _Doubtful_ , she texted back a moment later, watched as Effy read her message, turning around and raising an eyebrow suggestively. Emily flipped her off with two fingers and Effy turned back to her book with a slight smile.   
  
Lecture droned on and at some point Emily must have fallen asleep, because what felt like only moments later, she was being prodded roughly in the side by Katie, who told her to "Get up, you stupid cow, so we can get the fuck out of here."   
  
"Leave off, Katie," Emily said wearily. She rubbed at her eyes, sitting up and packing away her things.   
  
"Whatever," Katie said, having already lost interest. "I'll be outside, yeah? Danny's picking me up. If you don't want to have to fucking walk home on your own, I suggest you hurry up. Because we're not waiting for you."  
  
Emily watched her go. With a heavy sigh, she turned back to her things, slinging her bag over her shoulder. She was just about to leave when the professor glanced up from her desk. "Oh, Emily," she said. "I've something to talk to you about."  
  
"Miss," Emily said, hesitating. "I've really got to go -- "  
  
"It won't take more than a moment." Ms Tebbit said, reaching into her briefcase and pulling out a bright purple flyer. She handed it over to Emily, who took it reluctantly.  
  
"What's this?"  
  
"Information regarding the sixth form play," Ms Tebbit said, sitting on the edge of her desk. "I passed copies around for everyone during class, spoke a little bit about what we'd be doing this year. You, ahem, missed it."  
  
Emily felt her face grow hot at the idea of her completely knackered and passed out dead asleep at her desk in the middle of class. "Sorry. I mean, right, but -- play?"  
  
"Surely you haven't forgotten? We're doing  _A Midsummer Night's Dream_  this year."  
  
Emily said, "I'm not an actor, though."  
  
"All the world's a stage," Ms Tebbit made a wild flourish with her hands. "Besides, it's mandatory for all sixth formers."  
  
"But I have terrible stage fright," Emily protested weakly. "Miss, I really don't think I could do this. Perhaps maybe I could help with lighting. Or, or I could help with costuming or design. Or maybe -- "  
  
Ms Tebbit put a hand on her shoulder. "Relax. Just look the play over, alright? Give it a little bit of thought. Rehearsals are on Thursday afternoon. We'll see then if you're an actress or not."  
  
"Right," Emily said quietly, already feeling sick to her stomach. "Look, Miss, I've got to go."  
  
She turned and ran off before her teacher could say anything else.  
  
  
;;  
  
  
The halls were clearing out as Emily walked down them, keeping her head low. She grabbed her Politics and Maths books and stuffed them into her bag, slamming her locker shut with a heavy sigh. Thankfully, Katie was still outside when Emily got out there; she spotted her sister sitting on the front steps, smoking a fag and texting someone on her phone. Emily dropped her bag and sat down beside Katie, who patently ignored her.  
  
"Danny's late," Katie finally said in an annoyed voice, flicking away the ends of her cigarette. "Fucking annoying, innit? This is the fourth fucking time in two weeks." She fumbled around with her pack of Lucky Strike, tapping out another fag and lighting up quickly. "Fucking prick," she mumbled under her breath.  
  
"Why are you still dating him, then? I don't think you even fancy him."  
  
Katie snorted. "Of course I fancy him, you cow. Being a lezza doesn't make you fucking blind now, does it? He's well lush. And besides," she said, smiling to herself. "He treats me like a proper girlfriend."  
  
"You mean he buys you things," Emily said, rolling her eyes.  
  
"Yeah, so?" Katie frowned. "What would you know about it, anyway? I'm telling you, Ems. If we could just find you a nice, proper guy -- you know, who's fit and all that -- then you'd just come to your senses and just realize that you're not some like, fucking dyke." She exhaled a mouthful of smoke, looked Emily up and down. "If you'd just put in some fucking effort -- "  
  
Emily crossed her arms over her knees, resting her chin on them. "Don't start, Katie."  
  
"Whatever," Katie tapped the end of her fag with a slender finger, nail painted blood red. "I'm just trying to do you a fucking favour, Ems."  
  
"You mean you're trying to do  _yourself_ a favour," Emily said bitterly, staring out into the parking lot. "You don't want to be known as the girl with the gay twin."  
  
"Well, it's not as if it's something to be proud of, is it," Katie said meanly, as Danny's yellow coupé pulled up in front of them.  
  
  
;;  
  
  
Emily got dropped off at home, while Katie went off with Danny to watch him at footie practice.  
  
Her mum was in the living room thumbing through a magazine and watching the news at the same time. Emily kicked off her shoes at the front door and padded into the kitchen to fetch herself a Coke. She was about to head out again when she heard her mother's voice from the other room.  
  
"Emily, dear. Come in and sit with me for a bit."  
  
Emily sighed and trudged in dutifully, sitting down in a chair furthest away from where her mum was sat on the couch. "I can't stay very long, Mum," she said, swallowing a mouthful of Coke. "I promised Effy I'd meet up with her this afternoon to work on Maths homework. We've got an exam coming up, you know."  
  
Her mum gave her a smile that looked entirely too fake. "I just want to see how you are, honey," she said, in a syrupy-sweet voice. "How are things going with school?"  
  
"They're fine."  
  
"I know you've always been the more academic one of the two of you," her mother said, somehow managing to say it in a way that didn't sound complimentary at all. "But you should go out more; I'm sure Katie would be more than happy to take you with her --" Emily rolled her eyes at that "-- there's no reason to be sitting at home studying all the time."  
  
"I'm not always just sitting at home," Emily protested weakly. "And anyway, Mum, I'm not interested in hanging out with Katie and her friends. I have better things to do. Speaking of which -- I really have to go." She stood, slinging her bag over her shoulder. "Effy's waiting for me. I'll call if I'm staying late, yeah?"  
  
She didn't wait to hear her mum's response, hurrying out of the door and shutting the door loudly behind her.  
  
  
;;  
  
  
"I'm telling you, Ems," Effy said, lying back on her over-sized bed and blowing smoke rings up at the cracked white ceiling. "You should just tell her to fuck off."  
  
"Easier said then done," Emily told her, as she flipped through her notes from yesterday's class, being only one of them actually attempting to get work done. "You don't know, you don't have to live with Katie. You'd think there'd be some loyalty, you know, seeing as how she's my sister, but I suppose that's a bit too much to expect from her; after all, she can't exactly be seen being nice to someone like  _me_."  
  
Effy snorted. "Not like she was your best friend  _before_  you sat her down and clued her in to the fact you fancied girls."  
  
"Yeah, well."  
  
"Just tell her to fuck off."  
  
"It's not just her, though," Emily sighed, tossing her notebook to the side. "It's my whole fucking family, you know? My mum and dad just pretend like I'm -- well, I think they still believe this is some sort of phase I'm going to outgrow." She toyed with the edge of Effy's comforter. "Sometimes I kind of wish they were angry about it, you know? I mean, at least then I'd know that they actually cared."  
  
Effy crushed her fag out in the red-tinted glass ashtray on her night table. "What do you expect."  
  
"When's Cook coming over?" Emily asked, trying to change the subject. "I want to know so I can know when to leave. You know he fancies you, yeah? Christ, it's almost painful to watch, sometimes, the way he's always looking at you."  
  
"Like how you're always looking at Naomi Campbell," Effy remarked after a moment, and Emily felt a blush rise to her cheeks.  
  
"Shut up."  
  
Effy gave her a knowing smirk and reached across for another fag; Emily listened to the click of the lighter, the steady burn of the flame and the sound of Effy inhaling. She felt the bed dip as Effy laid back down beside her, staring at her with large blue eyes.  _What_ , Emily wanted to ask, because the way Effy watched her sometimes was a bit unnerving and even after years of knowing Effy, Emily was still unused to it.  
  
After several long moments, Effy rolled over onto her side, closing her eyes as she exhaled slowly. "It's almost eight."  
  
"Is he coming over?"  
  
"Does it matter?"  
  
Emily decided that it didn't, so she rolled off Effy's bed and began packing her things away. As she was packing, Effy sat up as well, stretching her arms up and over her head with a heavy sigh. Emily glanced over at her before straightening up, slinging her bag over her shoulder.  
  
"See you tomorrow then?"  
  
Effy nodded, crossing her legs. "Tell Katie I said hello."  
  
  
;;  
  
  
Wednesday was there before she knew it.  
  
"Are you on something?" Katie asked her, as Emily sat fidgeting on their bed, waiting for Danny to come pick them up so the day could just hurry up and be over.   
  
"Auditions are tomorrow," Emily told her, checking her watch for the umpteenth time that morning. "Aren't you nervous?"  
  
Katie laughed, capping her raspberry-coloured lipstick and tossing it onto their dresser. "Christ, are you really fucking worried about something like  _that_? You're more of a loser than I thought. It's just a fucking school play," she said, fixing her hair in the mirror. "No one takes these things seriously."  
  
Emily frowned. "Well, that's easy to say when everyone loves you no matter what you do or how foolish you look."  
  
The sound of a horn sounding from outside alerted them both to the fact that Danny had finally arrived. Katie gave Emily a smirk and grabbed her bag from beside the door, ducking out with a, "Well, come on then you cow, we won't wait for you."  
  
  
;;  
  
  
At night, she dreamed of Naomi sitting on one of the desks in their Literature class, reading lines of poetry outloud, her shirt unbuttoned just low enough to see the curve of her breasts, her skirt hitched up impossibly high. Every so often, she'd look up, glancing at Emily with a flirtatious smile. And then the dream flashed ahead and Naomi was in front of her, sliding her hands through Emily's hair, cupping Emily's face in her hands, and --  
  
"Come  _on_ ," Katie said, kicking at the mattress. "Wake  _up_. You're going to make us both late for college."  
  
"I don't want to go," Emily mumbled into her pillow without opening her eyes, annoyed at being so roughly woken up from what had been a rather unexpected but pleasant dream. "Leave without me. Tell mum I'm sick or something."  
  
"Can't," Katie told her, already moving away. "We've got auditions today, yeah? For that bloody school play."  
  
Emily sat up quickly. "Oh, fucking hell. I forgot about it completely," she said, running a hand through her hair. "Jesus, I can't believe it's so soon already; I'm not ready to do it yet."  
  
Katie rolled her eyes, checking her hair in the mirror. "Christ, don't get your fucking knickers in a twist about it," she said, as Emily tumbled out of bed and began getting dressed. "And hurry  _up_."  
  
  
;;  
  
  
At four o'clock that afternoon, Emily and Katie headed downstairs to the classroom where Ms Tebbit was holding auditions for the play casting. There was already a queue when they got there; Emily sat down at the end of it, pulling her History book out of her bag, figuring if she had to wait, she may as well use the time wisely and begin revising for next week's History exam. Katie just rolled her eyes and went over to where her friends were leaning against the lockers.  
  
"I hope I don't get a boy's part," Emily heard Sophia Winters say. "Can you just imagine it?"  
  
"I can't imagine  _any_  of it," Ella Collins said. "Regardless of what part we get, we're going to have to  _kiss girls_." She said the last bit with such obvious disgust that Emily was at once infuriated and amused. "I don't see why Tebbit had to pick this play -- we're all going to look like lezzas."  
  
Emily half-expected them to make some sort of joke about how she'd be well-up for this, then, but the door opened just then and Sophia was called inside to do a reading and the subject changed, inevitably, to Danny Guillermo, who had taken Katie out last weekend and bought her an expensive looking necklace.   
  
The time passed slowly. After Katie came out of the classroom, looking well annoyed, Emily put away her book and stood up, brushing herself off. "That bad, then?" she asked Katie, who frowned and grumbled something about how Shakespeare was fucking  _retarded_  and how she'd better not get stuck playing a boy.  
  
"Go on, then," Katie said, cocking her head in the direction of the open classroom door. "Hurry up so we can leave. Danny's been waiting outside for us; he's well impatient, you know that."  
  
Ms Tebbit was sitting at the piano when Emily came in, shutting the door behind her and dropping her bag beside it.   
  
"Here," Ms Tebbit, said, handing her a sheet a paper. "Just read the lines highlighted."  
  
Emily looked at the paper. She looked back up at Ms Tebbit, who was watching her expectantly. Emily swallowed hard to rid herself of the lump in her throat. Hesitant, she began to recite: " _And we fairies, that do run by the triple Hecate's team, from the presence of the sun_  -- I don't even know what I'm saying," Emily sighed, lowering the paper.  
  
"The meaning will come to you," Ms Tebbit said seriously, leaning back in the chair, arms crossed. "Continue, please."  
  
Emily started again, "Following darkness like a dream, now are frolic: not a mouse shall disturb this hallow'd house. I am sent with broom before, to sweep the dust behind the door."  
  
As she kept on reading, her mind drifted away, suddenly remembering last night's dream, of how Naomi'd turned the pages of her book slowly, the intensity in those gray-blue eyes, like rocks under water, the slight upward curve of her mouth and the pinkness of her lips, full and soft-looking. She felt like she was floating, like there was no gravity or anything keeping her tethered to the earth.  
  
"Now you're getting it," Ms Tebbit said, and Emily was suddenly pulled back into reality. "That was very nice Emily, thank you." She took the script back, giving Emily a warm smile.   
  
"Thanks," Emily said, managing a small smile in return, feeling herself flush a bit. "I've got to get going now, though," she shouldered her bag. "Katie's waiting for me."  
  
Ms Tebbit said, "See you tomorrow," and Emily nodded before ducking out --  
  
\-- And running smack into the blond she'd just been daydreaming about.  
  
"Oh, hello," Naomi said, looking down at her. "Was that you in there just now?"  
  
Emily felt her face grow hot again. "Yes. Why?"  
  
Naomi shrugged, brushed her fringe out of her eyes. "I'm just a bit surprised, is all. You sounded really good, reading those lines. I could hear it through the door," she explained, after a moment. "I'm sure Katie wouldn't know how to recite something done by Shakespeare if her life depended on it; I half-expected the same from you."  
  
"We're  _not_  the same," Emily said, a bit colder than she intended.  
  
"That's why I said I only  _half_  expected it.'" Naomi smirked. "Now, would you mind letting me go by? Not all of us have finished with our auditions."  
  
"Sorry," Emily said quietly, moving aside to let her pass. Then, louder, "Good luck."  
  
Naomi didn't respond or turn around.  
  
Emily hurried out to where Katie was waiting for her, not chancing a glance back at Naomi.  
  
  
;;  
  
  
The cast list was posted the next day.  
  
"Demetrius?" Sophia read out loud, next to Emily. "Is that a boy's part?"  
  
"Thank fuck, I'm Helena," Katie sighed next to her, visibly relieved.  
  
Suddenly Emily felt an elbow on her shoulder as someone leaned against her.  
  
"Looks like I'm one of the lovers, then," Naomi said, turning to look at her. "I'm Lysander."  
  
"I'm Puck," Emily swallowed, trying to rid herself of the heavy lump in her throat. This couldn't possibly be right; she wasn't talented enough to play this role, and it was just -- it wasn't right. She'd go see Ms Tebbit after classes today, tell her that she couldn't possibly be able to perform the part --  
  
"Congratulations, girls," Ms Tebbit said, stepping out from the classroom as if she'd read Emily's mind, smiling at them expectantly. "Awaken and empower what's within."  
  
Naomi glanced at Emily, then back at Ms Tebbit. "Right," she said, taking a few steps back. "Well, if you'll excuse me, I have practice now, so. See you later, Emily," she said, before turning and heading off in the direction of the hockey pitch.  
  
Emily wanted to stay and talk to Ms Tebbit, but just as she was about to open her mouth, Mr Driskill, the hockey instructor, strode up, looking very irritated. "I see you picked the cast for the senior play," he said, in a voice that showed he was clearly trying to remain calm and ignoring Emily completely. "I thought we discussed this; my girls don't have  _time_  for something like this."  
  
"It'll be good for them," Ms Tebbit said in a demure voice, taking down the cast list from the wall and toying with an edge of it, bending it back and forth. "And, I must remind you, Morgan Hill's curriculum clearly states that academics transcends athletics. The cast is final; I'm sure your girls will find they'll be able to do both this and hockey quite successfully."  
  
Mr Driskill frowned. "I'll speak to the Head about this, Tebbit. He'll side with me."  
  
"Please do," Ms Tebbit said. "I'd be curious to hear his thoughts on the matter. Now," she continued, nodding in Emily's direction, "if you don't mind, I have a student to speak with. And I believe you're late for practice, Mr Driskill."  
  
Mr Driskill's frown deepened and he shot Emily an annoyed look before storming off down the hall.  
  
"Miss," Emily said, after a moment. "I-I'm afraid you've got me all wrong. I can't do this part. I don't know anything about acting and really, honestly, there must be somebody more talented you can give this to. I'm awful at memorization and I'll completely bollocks all my lines up when I'm on stage. I'd be much happier to take a smaller role, if maybe -- "  
  
"Emily," Ms Tebbit said, cutting in. "I wouldn't have chosen you if I didn't think you were capable enough to do it."  
  
"Yes, but I -- "  
  
"It certainly won't be easy, of course," Ms Tebbit said, walking back into the classroom; Emily followed her inside, watched her pull a copy of  _A Midsummer Night's Dream_  from her desk drawer. "But I think you'll find that it's not so bad, once you get used to it." She held the copy out towards Emily, who hesitated a moment before taking it from her, studying the worn, olive-coloured cover.  
  
"I suppose," Emily said slowly, still uncertain. "I suppose I could at least  _try_  . . . "  
  
"Please do," Ms Tebbit said, as Emily tucked the playbook into her bag.   
  
Emily managed a smile. "Thanks. Sorry I've got to rush out but -- well, Katie's waiting for me."  
  
Ms Tebbit gave her another gentle smile. "See you tomorrow."  
  
"Yes," Emily said, already feeling nervousness creeping in. "Tomorrow."  
  
  
;;  
  
  
Whatever Ms Tebbit, Mr Driskill, and the Head had discussed, it apparently hadn't changed anything, because the next day, Naomi and the other hockey girls showed up for rehearsal. They filed into the auditorium, one by one, dressed in their practice kits, which Emily supposed was probably more for convenience than anything else, but she was more interested in the amount of leg Naomi was showing off in her skirt.  
  
Even Katie'd arrived on time, scowling, with her blond WAG mates in tow.  
  
Admittedly, despite her initial reluctance, Emily had to acknowledge that there  _was_  something rather thrilling about being cast as the lead role of the sixth form play. First of all, it was completely unexpected, and Emily very much enjoyed the fact that she'd bested Katie in something for once. And her parents had been grudgingly pleased about it as well (her dad more than her mum, who had frowned and poured herself more wine), which Emily took to be a good thing. Her mum  _had_  offered to sew her wings for her costume, though, later when they were in the kitchen washing up.  
  
"You don't have to, mum, really," Emily said, drying a plate. "The costume people can make them just fine."  
  
"No, no, I  _want_  to," Jenna insisted. "After all, I think it's a good thing that you got this part. It allows you to . . . branch out from Katie. You'll be less in her shadow now, so there won't be any need for you to try and act different just to get people to notice you."  
  
"Mum," Emily warned, putting the dish away rather roughly. "Don't."  
  
"I'm only  _suggesting_ , Emily," Jenna said, in a voice that meant she was anything but. "I just don't see why you had to just decide to be -- well, you're  _young_ , and I don't think people your age can really know about that sort of thing, can they?"  
  
Emily frowned. "I  _know_ , mum."  
  
"You  _think_  you know."  
  
"Fine." Emily threw the towel she'd been using to dry the dishes onto the counter. "Do whatever you'd like, mum. I don't really give a fuck about the wings."  
  
She stormed up to her room and had worked very hard not to cry, opting instead to kick all of Katie's things over to her side of the room and not caring that she knocked a cosmetics holder off their shared desk in the process. It wasn't as if Katie was ever home  _anyway_ , and even when she was, she never backed Emily up, always taking their mum's side.  
  
It was infuriating.   
  
Rehearsal was what she looked forward to now each day, and helped that they were all united as a form -- like clock-work, every day after classes were finished, they shuffled into the auditorium to go over their lines, slowly working to get them memorized. After two and a half weeks they started in on blocking, which made things doubly confusing and difficult, because now they were all trying to remember what do and where to stand as well as what to say.  
  
What  _didn't_  help was that Katie, along with the majority of the girls in their class, spent their days sulking and going through the motions with barely concealed boredom. Most of them were girls on the hockey team, who only perked up when they realised that rehearsal was over and they could run off to practice. Emily was secretly pleased to see that Naomi was  _not_  one of those girls; she actually took the whole thing very seriously and one afternoon Emily overhead her telling off Amy Banks for not putting in enough effort.  
  
She spent her free time at home, going over lines again and again. She imagined Naomi sitting on the end of the bed and reciting the lines along with her; it made her want to be even better, so that Naomi would be impressed. It was doubtful that Naomi was even paying attention to her -- her attentiveness in rehearsal notwithstanding, she hadn't said more than two sentences to Emily outside of them since the day of their auditions.   
  
Effy, who came over often at night to help her with memorizing, was less than helpful.  
  
"You're so lucky you don't have to act," Emily sighed, after failing once more to remember her line correctly. "How'd you manage to get out of it anyway?"  
  
"I don't talk," Effy said, lighting up a fag and inhaling sharply. "And I'm better at art."  
  
"You're shit at art," Emily told her, and Effy just smiled and leaned back against the wall, eyes closed.  
  
"You know she wants you," she said, after they'd packed it in for the night and were passing a spliff back and forth between them, Katie, thankfully, nowhere to be found. "Naomi, I mean."  
  
Emily laughed. "Right. No, I don't think so. She doesn't even know who I am."  
  
"Mm," Effy stared at her in that infuriatingly knowing way of hers.   
  
" _What_."  
  
Effy stretched out onto her back with a sigh, crossing her arms behind her head. The end of the spliff burned bright yellow-red in the semi-darkness of the room. Emily watched the smoke drift upward towards the ceiling in loose, lazy curls. "I've seen the way she looks at you," Effy said, in an almost bored tone, after several long moments of silence.  
  
"She's probably just surprised Katie and I are nothing alike," Emily told her, though she couldn't deny that the thought of Naomi watching her made her heart skip a beat. She remembered when she'd run into Naomi, weeks earlier, after her audition. Naomi'd been surprised. She'd said she thought Emily was  _good_.   
  
Emily had to duck her head to hide her sudden blush, at the thought.  
  
"You're wrong, Effy," she said, after a minute, when she'd managed to compose herself. "It's not what you think."  
  
"Okay," Effy said agreeably, exhaling a mouthful of smoke.  
  
  
;;  
  
  
"I'm just not understanding it," Emily complained to Ms Tebbit one afternoon, after a particularly bad rehearsal where Ella and Katie had kept knocking over pieces of scenery during their entrances and everyone seemed to have forgotten all her lines. "Look, here," Emily said, frustrated, jabbing her finger at the page. "'I'll put a girdle round about the earth in forty minutes.' What does that even  _mean_."  
  
"The meaning will come to you," Ms Tebbit said, with a smile. "You just have to give it time."  
  
"I've been trying to understand," Emily protested, shoving her playbook away, "but no matter what I do I can't seem to make sense of the lines. It's just nonsense to me."  
  
"Relax," Ms Tebbit said again, resting a hand on Emily's shoulder. "Unite rhythm with words and they will unlock to empower you, like a midsummer night's dream come true. Take pains, be perfect."  
  
Emily had nodded before leaving, but she wasn't quite as certain it would be that easy.  
  
Nevertheless, she found herself sat in her bedroom with her playbook in front of her, the house thankfully empty. She flipped through until she found the page from earlier. She read the line once, twice. She was uncomfortable sitting like this; she moved across the room to the desk she shared with Katie, flipping on the small lamp beside it to get a bit more light in.  
  
She said the line outloud: "I'll put a girdle round about the earth in forty minutes. I'll put a girdle round the earth in forty minutes. I'll put . . ."  
  
Emily tried to imagine the words being acted out, tried to see what was supposed to be happening. Her voice lowered to a whisper; she tried to tap the words out slowly with her finger, trying to find the rhythm in the words like Ms Tebbit had suggested.   
  
Something strange began to happen then, as she was reciting the line. The typed words began to fade and vanish from the page, until there was nothing left but a large blank space. Emily stopped speaking and stared at the book in her hands; in place of Puck's line was now a heading, in capital letters:  REMEDIES #3: CUPID'S LOVE JUICE.  
  
She stared at the page, as more lines began to form under that, softly reading them outloud. "Secure upon-sat stones of promontory, spark'd essence of the madly shooting stars, one drop or two of anything wat'ry . . ."  
  
It went on like that for several lines. Surely it was impossible; words didn't disappear off a page only to be replaced with a recipe to create a love spell. There wasn't even such a  _thing_  as a love spell potion -- and yet, she couldn't stop reading, and when she was finished, she set the book aside, standing up.  
  
Surely it was a dream, Emily thought, as she made her way downstairs, because there was no way she'd actually believed what had just happened had been real, and there was  _certainly_  no way she was actually fetching the ingredients to see if it could actually be possible. Her hands seemed to move of their own accord, fetching a bowl from the cupboard first, and Emily decided it would be better to just go with it than to question it. She knew, though, as she turned on the tap and cold water splashed against her hands, that this was anything but a dream. Why was she doing this? Even if the book  _had_  changed -- which she seriously doubted; she had probably just been too tired and imagined it all -- there was no way a love spell could actually work.  
  
And yet, as she sat at her desk, mixing all the required ingredients in the bowl, she felt a spark of excitement race through her. It  _could_  be possible, she thought, ridiculously. Certainly there was no harm in trying and it wasn't as if anyone would find out, if nothing happened.  
  
She blew into the bowl, twirling it around and watching the water, rocks, and flower petals swish together. She blew a second time, just for good measure, before turning back to her playbook, which was still open to the page with the potion instructions on it.   
  
Nothing happened.  
  
Something  _was_  supposed to be happening; she blew again. Nothing. She was starting to feel rather ridiculous at this point, but suddenly the words on the page began to fade and shift again, until nothing was left but this: SPEAK.  
  
With a sigh, she grabbed the mixing bowl and the book and relocated to her bed, leaning back against the wall and carefully setting the bowl to the side of her. She lifted the book back up, staring at the word.   
  
SPEAK. Speak what, she thought, starting to get annoyed, but when she turned the page, she discovered that a whole new verse of text had appeared.  
  
She took a breath, and began to recite: "I see their knavery. This is to make an ass of me, to fright me if they could. But I will not stir from this place, do what they can. I will work, up and down here."  
  
The more she recited, the more tired she felt. It felt as though every part of her body had turned to lead, like she was sinking lower and lower into the bed, being consumed by blankets and warmth. As she recited, she began to see it in her head: Naomi, resting on a bed of flowers, asleep, wearing a thin, pale, peach coloured dress. Her hair framed her face in loose curls. Emily saw herself, standing in the woods, leaning against a tree and watching her sleep.  
  
Sixth form girls, dressed in their costumes, hovered at the edges, waiting, watching them both.   
  
"I know not by what power I'm made bold," Emily sighed, as Naomi lay still, sleeping. "But still you flout my insufficiencies. The more my prayer, the lesser is my grace."  
  
She moved forward until she was at the bed of flowers; lying down beside Naomi, propping herself up on one elbow, she reached forward and brushed a loose strand of her from Naomi's eyes. "My ear should catch your voice, my eye your eye," she murmured, softly stroking Naomi's cheek with her fingertips, looking at her wistfully. "My tongue should catch your tongue's sweet melody; my tongue, your tongue, were the world mine."  
  
"Fairies away," she said, looking around the woods and catching their eyes. "Fetch me that flower; I'll lead them up and down."  
  
The girls moved in a flurry, chanting  _up and down and up and down_ , again and again, in voices barely above a whisper.  
  
"Oh," Emily sighed, once more turning back to Naomi, who still slept on. "Oh, why rebuke she who loves you so?"  
  
Naomi stirred then, eyes fluttering open. "What angel wakes me from my flowery bed? I pray thee, gentle mortal, speak again." She stared up at Emily; reaching forward, she put her hand against Emily's face, cradling it. Emily closed her eyes, putting her own hand against Naomi's.  
  
"Mine ear is much enamoured of thy note," Naomi continued, sitting up a bit, leaning in closer to Emily's face. "So is mine eye enthralled to thy shape. I'll follow thee," she pressed a kiss to Emily's forehead, and then, lower, to the corner of Emily's mouth. "I'll follow thee and make a heaven of hell."  
  
"A heaven of hell," Emily murmured in agreement, and leaned in to kiss Naomi --  
  
And then she woke up.  
  
"Ah, fucking  _hell_ ," she said, rubbing at her eyes. "Shit. Shit."  
  
Of course it had been a dream; she'd been foolish to think otherwise. She'd been exhausted and she'd drifted off to sleep and imagined the whole thing. She looked down to pick up her playbook off the floor --  
  
There it was. A bright, purple flower, resting right on top of it. She recognized the type straight away (pansy) and without even thinking listed off its meanings (remembrance, togetherness, union, love). It had most definitely  _not_  been there less than ten minutes prior, before she'd fallen asleep. Emily reached down hesitantly to pick it up, feeling the cool stem against her palm. The petals looked like they were wet with dew and there was a small pool of clear coloured liquid in the center of the flower; it smelled sweet, almost like lilacs.  
  
"What in the  _world_  . . . " she started, staring at it, just as the front door slammed and Emily heard Effy call up the stairs.   
  
"Hey, I'm here."  
  
"H-hold on," Emily called back, getting up and quickly shoving the mixing bowl underneath her bed. "Wait out there."  
  
"Hey," Effy said, coming into the room anyway, "did you start without me?"  
  
"What?" Emily asked, startled, and in the process of turning, accidentally splashed some of the liquid from the flower into Effy's face. Effy let out a small cry of surprise, wiping furiously at her eyes. Emily was startled into inaction; she didn't know whether she should say or do anything to help or just sit there staring.  
  
A second later Effy opened her eyes and stared straight at Emily for several long moments.  
  
Emily squirmed, worried and uncomfortable, with Effy's bright blue eyes locked on her so intensely. "Effy. Are . . . are you alright?"  
  
"How now, mad spirit," Effy said in a low voice, and stepped closer, until she was nearly on top of Emily, grinning.   
  
Emily jumped away, blushing furiously. "Oh, oh," she mumbled, grabbing for her copy of  _A Midsummer Night's Dream_ , knocking the flower off to the side of the bed. "Shit," she said, as Effy pressed her back down onto the bed, straddling her hips.   
  
"Stay," Effy said quietly.  
  
"No, no," Emily said, pushing her off and getting up, flipping through her book frantically. "I think I've seriously fucked up here. Where  _is_  that page," she went on, eyes moving over the pages until she managed to find the one from last night. "I'll put a girdle around the earth in forty minutes -- a girdle around the earth -- I'll put a -- forty minutes --  _fuck_."  
  
The pages didn't change.  
  
Effy got up from the bed. "It's so hot in here," she murmured, and with one swift move, rid herself of her dress, tossing the garment aside and pressing up against Emily, breath hot on Emily's neck. "Why do you bother with her, anyway," Effy said quietly, a finger tracing along Emily's jawline; Emily flinched at the touch. "She doesn't love you. But I do."  
  
"No, you  _don't_ ," Emily said, a bit frantically, trying to push her away again. "You just think you do."  
  
Effy only smiled and pressed a kiss to Emily's temple, her hands moving down and settling down Emily's hips. "Sweet," she whispered, and kissed Emily full on the mouth.  
  
At that moment the door opened and Emily's mum walked in.  
  
"Emily, I wanted to show you," she'd been saying, trailing off abruptly when she saw Effy pressing Emily up against the wall with a deep kiss. "Oh," her mum said, all cheerfulness immediately gone from her voice. "Oh."  
  
Emily shoved Effy off. "No, mum, it's not -- " she started, as her mother exited quickly, shutting the door behind her with a sharp clip. "You need to go," Emily said, turning around to face Effy. "Get dressed and go home and -- I don't know. Think about Cook."  
  
"But -- "  
  
" _Go_ ," Emily said, more forcefully this time.  
  
Effy frowned, but acquiesced. "Parting is such sweet sorrow," she sighed.  
  
Emily collapsed on her bed with a heavy sigh, as the door closed and she heard Effy go down the stairs. Today had somehow turned into a rather spectacular disaster. She'd somehow managed to make Effy fall in love with her -- something she couldn't yet figure out how to reverse, the book had been useless in these matters -- and her mum had walked in on them snogging. Emily didn't even want to know what her mum thought about  _that_ , wanted even less to think about her mum telling her dad about it; he'd probably throw a fit.  
  
She called Cook.  
  
"Can we meet? I need to tell you something. It's important."  
  
"Alright," he said slowly, after a minute, and she heard the strike of a match and the sound of him inhaling deeply.  
  
"I can meet you in twenty."  
  
"You know where to find me."  
  
  
;;  
  
  
Cook was sat in Freddie's shed when Emily arrived, reclining back on the couch and smoking a spliff, looking half-asleep. He perked up some when Emily dropped her bag to the floor with a heavy  _thud_  and sat down on the space beside him. He offered her the spliff and she took it, eyes closing as she exhaled, the smoke burning her lungs; she handed it back to him and he finished it off.  
  
"If you could make someone love you," Emily asked, after several long moments, when the spliff had been finished up. "Would you do it?"  
  
"That's what you came all the way over here to ask me?" Cook chuckled around a cigarette, holding it between his teeth while he tried to get his lighter to work, giving it an annoyed shake. "What a strange fuckin' thing to wonder about."  
  
Emily toyed with the cuff of her sleeve, looking at her distorted reflection in the bright, metal buttons there. "You fancy Effy. If you could get her to love you, wouldn't you want that? Wouldn't it be nice for someone to feel the same way about you as you felt about them?"  
  
Cook shrugged, finally lighting up. "It wouldn't be the same though, would it, because you'd always wonder if they actually loved you or if it was just because you wanted them to. I don't think it'd be real. You know?"  
  
"Yeah," Emily sighed, the spliff and cigarrette smoke making her tired. "Yeah. You should tell her," she said suddenly, remembering the insanity that had been her afternoon. Maybe she could fix things with Effy. "You know, how you feel," she clarified, giving Cook a pointed look.  
  
"Effy?" Cook looked up, eyebrows raised. "No," he shook his head. "I can't. It'd be weird. We're like, friends, you know? I mean, we've shagged a few times, innit? But, well,  _love_  -- it'd just be weird. Besides, she doesn't like me the same way, so there'd be no point."  
  
"I made a mistake," Emily said, after a minute. Cook looked up at her curiously. "But don't worry," she assured him. "I think I can fix it." She pushed herself off the couch and onto her feet, pulling her jacket tighter around herself to block out the cool night air. "Just tell her, okay?"  
  
"Maybe," Cook called after her, as she left the shed, pulling her hood up to shield herself from the rain that had started.  
  
  
;;  
  
  
She couldn't sleep that night.  
  
All she could think about was Effy, the way she'd changed in an instant, how the words in her playbook had disappeared just as suddenly as they'd appeared. It felt like a dream, almost, and she rolled over onto her side, yanking the blankets higher up around her, hoping for sleep; maybe when she woke up everything would be back to normal. Surely this kind of thing . . . Well, it simply couldn't be real. There weren't such things as love spells being hidden inside old Shakespearean plays and Effy definitely did  _not_  fancy her, so there had to be a logical explanation for everything. After all, she'd been exhausted when she'd been practicing her lines; she'd probably just dreamed it all up. And Effy, maybe her reaction had been a side effect of whatever drug she'd taken before she'd come over (she was always on something  _anyway_ ). It was completely possible.  
  
Her mum hadn't talked to her since that afternoon. Emily'd passed on dinner so as to not have to sit through what would have most likely been an incredibly awkward conversation. (She imagined it would have been awkward regardless as to whether or not her mum actually believed being gay was a phase, but in this case it would have been more so.) That, and the thought of sitting through another meal with Katie's tosser boyfriend was anything but appetizing.  
  
Her mum  _had_ , however, surprised her by making her wings, which had actually turned out rather nice. They had a piping frame, but were light and loose everywhere else; the material felt soft and smooth, like silk. Her mum had embroidered tiny fake pearls sporadically along the outsides, making them sparkle in the light. It'd been unexpectedly nice and she'd gone downstairs to give her mum a hug before bed, as thanks.  
  
"I'm sorry," Emily had mumbled into her shoulder. "About this afternoon, I mean."  
  
"It's fine," Jenna'd said, with a tight smile, and even if Emily wasn't really all that sure she meant it, she appreciated the effort regardless.  
  
Emily rolled over again; now she was staring at Katie's side of the room (and subsequently, Katie's empty bed). She and Katie hadn't been close for a while now, but for once Emily wished that her sister was around. At least she'd be able to make sense of everything -- or at least tell Emily she was being an idiot, which also would have been appreciated at the moment, considering Emily felt like she was going mad.  
  
( _Surely_  she couldn't have imagined it.)  
  
  
;;  
  
  
Emily showered slowly, letting the hot water fall around her, almost hot enough to burn her skin. The night before had been awful; when she'd finally managed to drift off to sleep, she'd had a dream about Effy stripping off all her clothes, lipstick bright red in the moonlight as she crawled across the bed to where Emily'd been sitting. And Naomi had been there too, in her hockey kit, wearing her perpetual bored look; 'Go on then,' she'd said to Emily, with an impatient eye roll, and Emily'd felt Effy pressing her down into the bed -- until Katie'd woken her up with a kick to her mattress, as usual.  
  
She'd decided there was only one thing left to do, if she really wanted to see if everything that had happened yesterday  _had_  really happened.  
  
She left for school without waiting for Danny to drop by to give them a ride; she didn't want to be sitting in the car with Katie on a day like today when her heart was racing with some kind of sudden, unknown excitement. She kept the wings and the flower in her locker until rehearsal, taking care that she was the last one to arrive. She stood, hidden in the wings, waiting for her cue to come on stage; they were rehearsing in costume today, thankfully, otherwise she would have looked ridiculous, she thought, pinning her wings onto the back of her shirt. The flower was tucked into her belt, waiting, at the ready.  
  
Effy hadn't shone up to classes this morning, which had been both a blessing and curse; on one hand, she didn't know for sure if the flower -- spell, potion,  _whatever_  it was -- had really worked, but on the other hand, if it  _had_  worked, she wouldn't have wanted to spend the day trying to evade a lovesick Effy. Hopefully Cook had talked to her, Emily thought, toying with a button on her shirt; hopefully that could undo her mistake.  
  
Act Two was being rehearsed today; as the first scene ended, Emily felt herself getting more nervous by the minute. It wasn't until Ms Tebbit gestured for her to come out that she realized it was her line.  
  
"Through the forest have I gone," she said, walking on stage, surrounded by the sets and other girls, feigning sleep. "But Athenian found I none, on whose eyes I might approve this flower's force in stirring love."  
  
She moved away, towards Kelly Parker, who was playing Hermia, and Naomi, as Lysander, both slouched against the prop tree that took up the better half of the stage. She crouched slightly, to bring herself nearer to eye level with them. "Night and silence -- who is here? Weeds of Athens he doth wear. And here the maiden, sleeping sound, on the dank and dirty ground." She ruffled Kelly's hair in a show of mock affection; Kelly glared up at her through half-opened eyes.  
  
Emily ignored her, turning her attention back to Naomi. It was now or never; she carefully pulled the flower from its holder.  
  
"Oh, cute," Kelly said, breaking character. "You brought your own props."  
  
Ms Tebbit hushed her and nodded for Emily to continue. Emily shifted over, bending down on one knee, watching Naomi, who kept her eyes closed, dutifully pretending to sleep. "Churl, upon thy eyes I throw all the power this charm doth owe. When thou wakest, let love forbid."  
  
She held the flower up to Naomi's eyes; like with Effy, the movement caused some of the watery liquid from the flower to splash in Naomi's eyes. Naomi flinched, wiped at her eyes. She opened them after a moment, blinking rapidly. Emily held her breath.  
  
"Emily?" Naomi asked, as if she didn't know who Emily was. She reached forward, cupping Emily's face in her arms, and began to lean up --  
  
" _Ugh_!" Amy, off the side, exclaimed. "That's  _disgusting_."  
  
Emily pulled away from Naomi, scrambling back onto her feet. She moved quickly, dosing Amy's eyes with the love potion, before Amy could react. Amy made a tiny cry of surprise and wiped furiously at her eyes. Emily jumped away, moving across the stage to Kelly, and dousing her with the love potion too.   
  
Ms Tebbit was grinning.  
  
Emily was shocked; she hadn't expected the love potion to even work. She'd convinced herself that the whole thing had just been a ridiculous dream. And yet, here she was, watching as Amy and Kelly crossed the stage and embraced each other passionately, mouths pressed tight against each other.  
  
Oh, Emily thought to herself, twirling the flower in her hands, this could be fun.  
  
She sprang into action, quickly spraying each of the girls on stage with the love potion, as Naomi stood watching, staring at Emily with open affection. Emily couldn't help but laugh, as Sophia and Ella's eyes met across the stage and they ran towards each other, pressing their lips together in a flurry of kisses. The other girls reacted in turn; as they opened their eyes, they moved towards the person they saw first, grabbing them in by their blouses and ties and kissing them almost frantically.  
  
Mr Driskill burst into the auditorium just then, clearly annoyed about rehearsal time cutting into the hockey practice time. Emily watched as he surveyed the room, the girls pressing each other against the walls, undoing the buttons on their tops, watched as he went slack-jawed with shock, and she couldn't help the grin that spread across her face.  
  
"What the hell . . . " he started, disbelieving.   
  
Emily jumped off the stage and ran towards him, splashing his eyes as well.  
  
He stumbled backwards out the door.  
  
"Emily," Naomi said, jumping down off the stage as well.  
  
Emily looked back once, then went out the door towards the hockey pitch, leaving Naomi standing there, watching.

 

;;  
  
  
Effy and Cook were the first people Emily saw as she made her way across the hockey pitch.  
  
"Emily!" Effy called, running towards her, with Cook not far behind.  
  
" _What_  did you do to my girlfriend?" Cook asked, glaring at Emily, while Effy pressed herself up against her, kissing Emily's neck.  
  
"I missed you, bright eyes," she murmured softly; Emily pushed her off.  
  
"No, you  _promised_ ," she said, even as Effy reached for her again.  
  
Cook grabbed Effy's wrist, pulling her back some. "Is this some sort of fucking joke?" He asked, looking back and forth between Emily and Effy with an incredulous look on his face. "You're mocking me, right? You said she  _liked_  me."  
  
Before Emily could answer, Naomi ran up. "Oh, love, you run so fast," she said, out of breath, as she tried to wrap her arms around Emily's waist. "I can feel your heartbeat."  
  
" _You_  have practice," Emily told Naomi, untangling herself from Naomi's grasp.  
  
"Was this that accident you told me about?" Cook asked, sounding angrier by the second. "What, did you seduce my girlfriend, is that it?"  
  
"Girlfriend?" Effy said, confused.  
  
"Yes," Emily said hurriedly, once more shoving Effy away towards Cook. " _Effy_  was the accident I was trying to tell you about but -- but I'll fix it, I promise. Just -- give me a moment, okay? I need to think about this. Come on," she said, turning to Naomi, who was still standing there, staring at her wistfully. "Let's just leave."  
  
Effy looked pained. "No, don't leave me," she said, reaching for Emily. Thankfully Cook held her back.  
  
"I'm sorry," Emily said once more, turning back for a second."I really am. I promise I'll fix this."  
  
  
;;  
  
  
Of course they ran into Emily's mum on the walk back home.  
  
"Who's that?" Naomi asked, glancing back as Jenna called after them. "Do you know her?"  
  
"Yeah," Emily sighed, and kept on walking. "That's my mum."  
  
"No, wait," Naomi said, stopping. "I want to meet her."  
  
" _No_ ," Emily said emphatically, tugging on Naomi's sleeve, as their mum ran up to them, with a woman Emily recognized as a co-worker at the salon her mum worked at.   
  
Naomi stuck out her hand, shaking Jenna's earnestly. "Hi," she said brightly, beaming. "I'm Naomi. You have a  _brilliant_  daughter," she told Jenna, giving her hand one last shake. "She's really quite lovely."  
  
Jenna looked shocked. "Oh, well, nice to meet you," she said. "I'd like to introduce -- "  
  
"Mum, no," Emily pleaded, fidgeting. "We've got to go. We've got a lot of . .. uh, rehearsing to do."  
  
It was then that Jenna's friend hurried up, smiling widely at the three of them. "Emily!" she said, shaking Emily's hand vigorously. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you. I'm Dora, a friend of your mum's; believe me, she talks about you all the time. And is this," she took off her sunglasses, giving Naomi a once-over. "Why, Naomi Campbell. You look quite  _luminous_  today."  
  
Naomi smiled and glanced over at Emily. "I'm in love."  
  
"Oh, well, that's wonderful," Dora gushed, folding her sunglasses and tucking them into her blouse pocket. "See, Jenna?" She said, turning to Emily's mum. "This is  _exactly_  what I was talking about -- rising above, yes? Your daughter, compatriots with Morgan Hill's star hockey player." She laughed; Jenna forced a smile.  
  
"We're not compatriots," Naomi said, interrupting. "We're girlfriends."  
  
Dora's smile froze. "Sorry?"  
  
"We're girlfriends," Naomi said again, still grinning. "Like, we're dating."  
  
Emily watched her mother's mouth drop open and knew it was time to go. "Well, yes, it was nice meeting you," she said quickly, flashing Dora and her mum both a weak smile. "I'll see you at home mum. Come on Naomi," she continued in a low voice, gripping Naomi's arm and leading them away. "Let's go."  
  
"Nice meeting you," Naomi said as well, over her shoulder, beaming.  
  
As they walked away, Emily could hear her mum and Dora arguing. She didn't have to hear the words to know  _what_  they were arguing about. She'd heard her parents arguing over the same thing before, when she'd first come out to them about being gay. She could only imagine what Dora was saying to her mum about it; she didn't think it would be fair to let her mum have to deal with something like that on her own.  
  
"Wait here," Emily said to Naomi, running back to where her mum and Dora were.  
  
"Emily," Jenna said, surprised as Emily slipped in between her and Dora."What are you -- "  
  
"Don't worry mum," Emily said, reaching for the flower, which was still tucked into the waistband of her skirt. "I've got your back."  
  
Dora opened her mouth to say something, but before she could, the love potion was being splashed into her eyes. Emily grinned and put the flower away, giving Dora a shove towards Jenna.   
  
"Oh, my mascara," Dora said, as she wiped frantically at her eyes.  
  
Jenna was still standing there gaping, dumbstruck. "Emily, -- "  
  
"Here," Emily said, with a final wave to her mum. "Try taking a walk in my shoes for a while."  
  
She couldn't help but grin as she made her way back to Naomi, who was leaning against the side of a building with her bicycle, smoking. She smiled as she caught Emily's eyes and Emily felt a surge of happiness race through her, more so than she'd ever felt before. Naomi was  _hers_. And things were turning out better than expected, even with the mishap of accidentally making Effy fall in love with her. But she could fix that later, she knew. She just had to think of a way to undo the spell.  
  
For now though, she thought, slipping her hand into Naomi's, it could wait.   
  
  
;;  
  
  
The spring carnival had begun today and from a mile away Emily could see the lights, flickering on one by one as day slowly melted away into the night. The carnival was an annual tradition, put on every year by a committee that her mum used to be a part of, before her dad had lost his job at the gym and Jenna had had to take a different job as a planner at a wedding company, leaving her with no extra time to do anything else. Emily remembered when she and Katie used to go, when they were little. Before all the fighting and the boys and the parties.  
  
Katie, terrified of heights, had hated going on the ferris wheel, so Emily rode it by herself. There was something liberating about it, especially when the ride stopped with Emily's cart still at the top. It felt like she was being suspended in more than just space; for the smallest of moments, it felt like time itself had stopped. Nothing mattered except right in this very second, when she was completely alone, detached from the rest of the world.  
  
Of course then she always had to come down, eventually, but she never got over that feeling.  
  
Lying on the grass with Naomi in the park, Emily felt that same rush race through her once more. When Naomi leaned over, stroking Emily's cheek with her fingers once before gently gripping the back of her head to pull her in for a kiss, Emily thought about being a little girl again, suspended in time, where nothing else mattered. Except right now.  
  
"I love you," Emily murmured against Naomi's lips.  
  
"Yeah." Naomi sighed, pulling back a bit, eyes closed, a slight smile playing across her lips. "I love you too."  
  
Emily felt herself drift away, for one sweet, unbelievable second. Naomi loved her. And then a second later she remembered  _why_  Naomi loved her and came crashing down to Earth. It was all just the spell. Emily searched Naomi's face for truth, hoping against hope that maybe, just maybe, it wasn't  _entirely_  the spell doing this to Naomi. That maybe some small part of her really did love Emily back.  
  
She sat up, stretching. Suddenly cold, she rubbed her bare arms. Naomi  _mmm_ -d and sat up as well, pressing a kiss to Emily's shoulder before nuzzling against it. "Let's go to the carnival," she said, after a moment, finding Emily's hand and threading their fingers together.  
  
Emily shook her head. "I don't think so."  
  
"Why not?" Naomi looked at her curiously.  
  
It was too impossible to explain. "You're just -- you're  _different_  now," Emily said after a moment, helplessly. "I don't think, you know, that you're ready for this. I mean, for people to see us. Together. You don't know what it's like. Katie used to make fun of me all the time for being gay, before I even knew what it was."  
  
Naomi gave Emily's hand a squeeze. "Don't worry. I'll protect you."  
  
"No," Emily pulled away, untangling their fingers, pushing herself up to her feet, brushing off her skirt. She couldn't stand this, this fake desire to help. "I don't want protecting. Besides," she said sadly, in a softer voice. "You didn't even  _like_  me yesterday."  
  
The look on Naomi's face was a mixture of confusion, adoration, and something else that Emily couldn't quite place. Almost like desperation, she thought, as Naomi stood up as well.   
  
"I did like you," Naomi told her quietly, stepping forward and reaching out for Emily, who suddenly felt rooted to the spot. Her arms wrapped themselves around Emily's waist and Emily felt herself falling, hopelessly. She buried her face into Naomi's shoulder, inhaling the sharp scent of washing powder.  
  
Naomi kissed the top of Emily's head. "I did  _like_  you," she said again. "I just fell in  _love_  with you today."  
  
They stayed like that for some time, Naomi stroking the back of Emily's head, Emily trying to memorize the feeling of Naomi against her, soft and warm and smelling slightly of smoke and vanilla.   
  
Finally Emily said, into Naomi's shoulder, "I hate this town. I can't wait until I graduate and can get the hell out of this place forever."  
  
Naomi pulled back a bit, so that they were looking into each other's eyes. "It's not that bad," she told Emily, thumbs stroking up and down Emily's arms. It was terribly distracting. Naomi said, "What about your family?"  
  
Emily scoffed. "What, you mean Katie?"  
  
"Well, everyone."  
  
"It's mostly just Katie. And that's on a good day."  
  
Emily pulled the rest of the way back, breaking them apart. She moved to sit on a bench nearby, sitting down with a sigh. She stared out at the city, listening to the quiet roar of traffic and people in the distance. "I don't want to go back."  
  
"Go back to what?" Naomi sat down beside her.  
  
"To real life."  
  
Naomi's mouth widened into a grin. "This  _is_  real life," she said, with a small laugh, bumping into Emily's shoulder playfully with her own. Emily reached for Naomi's hand again, resting her head on Naomi's shoulder.  
  
"Yeah, you're right. But it's so, so far from where I woke up this morning." She let out a small, bitter laugh as an older couple passed them with curious, almost disgusted looks on their faces. "People are staring at us," Emily said.  
  
"So stare back." Naomi's tone was hard. Emily turned to look at her, surprised. "They're just jealous," Naomi went on, squeezing Emily's hand tighter. "They're jealous because I'm with the most beautiful girl in Bristol."  
  
Emily laughed then, instantly feeling better. She cupped Naomi's face in her hands, kissing her. It was deeper than their kisses before. Fuller, more confident. Naomi tasted like fags and Cherry Cokes, which they'd picked up on the way to the park, earlier. Sweet.  
  
They pulled apart after a minute, resting their foreheads together. It felt like every nerve ending in Emily's body was like lightning, tingling with the sense of possibility. This must be real, she told herself, as Naomi bumped their noses together with a chuckle, smiling broadly.  
  
"People  _can_  change," she said, and for a second, Emily believed that anything was possible.  
  
Emily  _mmm_ -ed and shifted, suddenly remembering the pansy tucked into the waistband of her skirt and how earlier she'd used it on Dora. She grinned at the thought, imaging how when Dora had opened her eyes she'd fallen instantly for Emily's mum. Emily felt a tiny stab of guilt at subjecting her mum to such a thing, but she told herself that it was worth it; maybe people would get it, then. About being gay. Maybe they'd understand a little better.  
  
She sat up, the stem of the flower poking uncomfortably into her side. "How many people are in Bristol?" she asked.  
  
Naomi shrugged. "I don't know. A hundred thousand, maybe. Probably more."  
  
Emily stood up, pulling Naomi along with her, moving towards the direction of the carnival. "Come on," she said, glancing back to Naomi who moved to catch up, a giddy smile splashed across her face. "Let's go change some people."  
  
  
;;  
  
  
The carnival was busier than Emily had expected it to be, but it was probably due to the unusually warm evening weather. People milled around the rides and tents, shouting and laughing; Emily felt like an island in a sea of oblivion. She reached across and took Naomi's hand in her own, smiling up at her. Naomi beamed down at her and gave Emily's hand a gentle squeeze, grounding her. Off to the side, Emily saw some of the girls from her school kissing near the woods, affected by the spell from the afternoon's play rehearsal. She grinned and gave Naomi's hand a squeeze back, before pulling her off to the side and standing up on tiptoe to give her a quick kiss.  
  
Her happy reverie was quickly interrupted though by the sight of Cook making his way through the crowd to her. "Oh, fantastic," Emily murmured. She quickly stepped away from Naomi, pulling her hand away from Naomi's own with growing trepidation.  
  
"Game's over, Emily man," Cook said coming up to her with Effy in tow.  
  
When Effy saw Emily, her face lit up and she jumped forward, wrapping Emily in a tight embrace. "I missed you!"  
  
Cook tugged her back. "Get off her!"  
  
"What is this?" Naomi asked, looking back and forth between Effy, Cook, and Emily. She reached down and took Emily's hand, threading their fingers together. "Is everything all right?"  
  
"What are you doing with my girlfriend?" Effy demanded, glaring at Naomi.  
  
" _Your_  girlfriend?" Naomi said. "She's  _my_  girlfriend."  
  
"But she loves  _me_!" Effy insisted, as Cook grabbed her around the waist, pulling her back a few feet.   
  
"Alright now, Emilio," he said, struggling to keep a hold of Effy. "You mind telling me what the fuck is going on here? Effy hasn't shut up about you all day, keeps talking about true love and how you two are meant to be. Whatever you did to her, I want you to fix it.  _Now_ ," he grunted, as Effy wriggled free and ran towards Emily, throwing her arms around Emily's neck.  
  
Naomi grabbed Effy by her shirt, yanking her off Emily. "What the fuck?" she said, scowling at Effy, who looked as though she wished Naomi would drop dead right on the spot. "Emily's mine," Naomi declared, wrapping her arm around Emily's waist. "It's me that she loves."  
  
"She's just messing with your head, Ems," Effy said, giving Naomi a shove. "Why don't you stop teasing her and just go back to your  _boyfriend_?"  
  
Naomi shoved her back. "Any love that I had for him is gone now, I swear," she said, looking at Emily with sad, desperate eyes.  
  
"Look, stop it, both of you!" Emily cried, untangling herself from Naomi and stumbling away. "Cook," she said desperately, turning to him. "Cook, just let me explain. It isn't what you think -- honestly! It was just a mix-up, a complete accident, I swear."  
  
Cook didn't look impressed, as he grabbed Effy's arm to keep her from hitting Naomi, who looked spitting mad. "Must have been some fucking  _mistake_ ," he spit at her, as Effy twisted in his grasp, lunging for Naomi, who danced away, just out of reach.  
  
"It  _was_ ," Emily said, silently begging for him to understand. "James, I didn't want this. I never wanted this. I just wanted -- there was a poem -- in my playbook -- I thought maybe -- "  
  
"Emily?" Katie said, suddenly appearing. "What are you doing?"  
  
Emily was stunned. "Katie? Why are you here? And isn't that," she swallowed hard, looking at the boy beside Katie who was currently holding Katie's hand. "That's  _Naomi's_  boyfriend, Katie," she said, struggling to understand. Everything was turning into such a mess. "Or  _was_. No,  _is_. I mean, I don't know!"  
  
"Naomi didn't seem to be quite so interested in me," Freddie said, glancing over at her fighting with Effy, Cook still attempting to keep them apart and failing miserably. "In fact," he said, narrowing his eyes and turning back to Emily, "it looks as though she's more interested in  _you_."  
  
"I -- " Emily faltered, feeling her face grow hot. "What?"  
  
"Katie told me about this afternoon," he said, his tone twinged with just the slightest hint of anger. "About what happened. About you and Naomi."  
  
"It's really  _not_  what you think," Emily said, as Naomi broke away from Effy and Cook, bounding over to where Emily was, slinging an arm around her neck and pressing a kiss to her cheek.   
  
Katie raised an eyebrow. "It's not? So what  _is_  it then, Emily?"  
  
There was only one thing to do, Emily thought, frantic. She dreaded the idea of doing this to Katie -- she'd specifically  _not_  splashed Katie's eyes with the love potion earlier that day during auditions. It just didn't seem right, as if somehow she was betraying her sister's trust. Breaking the special bond that only they shared. The one they'd  _always_  shared, even when Katie turned mean and started being an absolute twat to her and for no reason other than the fact that Emily had finally admitted she'd liked girls.  
  
But that reasoning didn't seem to be quite so sound now, so it was with one swift, quick movement that Emily snatched the flower from the waistband of her skirt and held it up to Katie and Freddie's faces, splashing their eyes with the love spell. They both gave a tiny cry of surprised, scrubbing at their eyes. Emily grabbed Naomi's arm, pulling her back just as Effy and Cook tumbled into Katie and Freddie's line of view.  
  
"Oh," Katie said, her gaze settling on Effy. "Babes, I never realized this before, but you're  _well fit_."  
  
"An Adonis," Freddie swooned, stepping towards Cook and putting a hand against his face, staring at him with wonderment. "How is it that my eyes did not see it until now? Such perfect form and grace."  
  
Cook jerked away from Freddie, staring at him. "Is everyone insane?" he asked, turning to Emily. "Whatever it is you're doing, you need to stop. I'm not  _gay_ ," he insisted loudly, as Freddie moved in closer; he shoved Freddie back. "Get off!"  
  
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Emily said, tucking the flower back away and wringing her hands.   
  
"I'll fight you if I have to," Naomi said to Emily's left, still squaring off with Effy, only now with Katie attempting to wrap her arms around Effy's waist. Each time Effy pushed her off and each time Katie came back, undeterred.  
  
Effy grinned meanly. "Come on then," she said, raising an eyebrow before running off towards the park that Naomi and Emily had just come from. Emily reached out to try and grab Naomi's hand, but Naomi was too quick for her; she took off after Effy without even a glance back.  
  
Emily put her face in her hands, trying desperately not to just burst into tears; everything was such a fucking mess now and she had no way to fix it all. This wasn't what she had meant to do at all and how could everything have gotten so bloody complicated in only a matter of hours. She looked up, pulling her hands away and folding them under her chin.  
  
Right. Things were fucked up right now, but all she wanted to do was just  _be_  with Naomi for a little while, spell or no spell. Effy and Cook and the others could wait. It would do them a bit of good, she thought meanly, to finally realize what it was like to be  _her_ , to understand how easy their lives were in comparison. Maybe they'd finally get it. Yes, let them suffer for a bit; it only seemed fair.  
  
"Emily," a voice said, behind her. Emily whirled around to see Ms Tebbit standing near one of the tents, arms crossed and smiling. She apparently hadn't changed her outfit from earlier in the day and was still clothed in the long, soft green and tan dress she'd had on at school. "Have we had our fun yet?" she asked, quirking an eyebrow, apparently unperturbed by -- or maybe just unaware of -- the chaos Emily was causing.  
  
Emily sighed and ignored her, turning away and heading off towards home to get her bike.  
  
There were two things going through her mind right now. The first was that she had to find where Naomi had run off to; the last thing she wanted was for Effy and Naomi to hurt themselves in a fight due to some stupid spell. The second was that if she was actually going to try and make a difference in this too, she'd have to start tonight. Maybe it wasn't the best idea, but it was all she had; this was an opportunity to get people to finally understand what life was like for her.  
  
Her bike was in the garage, behind all her dad's old gym equipment. She hadn't ridden it in quite some time; the first few feet were wobbly and unsure, but as she began to pedal faster, the bike straightened, rolling down the street smoothly. She could feel the flower's stem poking into her thigh, where it was still hidden away safely along her skirt's waistband. Rolling down the hill towards the center of town, she felt a certain swell of excitement rise in her.  
  
She had people to change.  
  
  
;;  
  
  
She found Naomi at dawn, near the school.  
  
Naomi looked a little banged up, with a bruise slowly forming on her cheek and a bit of blood on her lip, but aside from that and a long, jagged rip along the bottom of her blouse, she looked no worse for wear. Emily wondered if Naomi and Effy actually  _had_  come to blows over her, and she felt overwhelmed with guilt. This was entirely her fault; she had to put things to right.  
  
But maybe, maybe it could wait. Just for a day or so, Emily thought, swallowing hard to rid the lump that had formed in throat. After all, she'd always had to -- well, it wouldn't be fair, to give Naomi up after she'd only just got her. Even if it was only the spell that made Naomi act that way, made her say the things she said -- it didn't matter. It felt real enough, and standing here in the early morning light, Naomi's hair shone like a halo around her head. She was impossible to resist.  
  
Emily made a come here motion to Naomi, reaching forward to wipe away a bit of blood from the corner of Naomi's mouth. She hesitated for a moment, before leaning in for a tentative kiss.  
  
"You all right?"  
  
"Fine," Naomi said, smiling with a slight wince. "Really. But I don't think Effy's going to come around any more tonight."  
  
"No," Emily said slowly, brushing a strand of peroxide blond hair away from Naomi's eyes, tucking it behind her ear. "I don't think she will."  
  
"Can we go somewhere?" Naomi asked suddenly, gesturing to Emily's bike, which was currently lying on its side on the grass from where Emily had dropped it, when she'd jumped off to make sure that Naomi wasn't hurt. She hadn't expected Naomi to still be out at this sort of hour and had nearly fallen off her bike when she'd spotted her.  
  
"Where?"  
  
"Anywhere."  
  
  
;;  
  
  
They ended up at the lake.  
  
Emily had been coming here since she was a little girl. It had once been her and Katie's hiding spot, when they wanted to get away from their parents, when James became too irritating and smart to just fuck off when they told him to. So they'd found this place, where the trees sat low to the ground, bordering a small lake, their lowest branches drooping into the water. The water was always unimaginably cold, for some reason, but she and Katie used to dare (or sometimes just push, if either of them was feeling particularly mean) each other to jump in.  
  
But it looked different now, with Naomi standing beside her, both of them still in their school kits. Emily couldn't quite put her finger on the  _why_ , she just knew. And it felt different too, being here, especially when Naomi began to undo the buttons on her blouse, winking at Emily with a coy smile.  
  
Emily looked at her. "What?"  
  
"I was thinking of going for a swim," Naomi said, dropping her top to the ground, hands moving to her skirt. "Don't you want to?"  
  
"It's  _cold_ ," Emily told her, motioning towards the water.   
  
"I don't mind." Emily tried not to openly stare, but found this to be a rather difficult task indeed. It wasn't as if she wasn't allowed to look (or so she assumed), but it seemed so strange to just be stood here watching Naomi undress for a swim as if it were nothing.  
  
(And it certainly wasn't  _nothing_ , what with the curve of Naomi's hip, her impossibly long legs, and her skin, which looked very pale in the dim, almost pink light of morning.)  
  
"You're not coming?" Naomi asked, as she sat down on the edge of the lake and slowly pushed herself into the water. Emily flinched inwardly, imaging how cold it must be, but Naomi didn't seem to mind. She ducked her head under the water for a moment, bursting up, brushing back her wet hair. She grinned at Emily, splashing a bit of water at her.  
  
Emily laughed and kicked off her shoes, taking off her socks as well and rolling them into a ball. She sat down on the little ledge next to the lake that Naomi'd climbed off of, dipping her feet into the water. It wasn't quite as cold as she'd been expecting. Or maybe it was because she wasn't paying much attention to the water; she was more interested in Naomi, backstroking lazily a few feet away.  
  
She hadn't figured Naomi for a swimmer. Then again, she thought, there was probably a lot about Naomi she didn't know.  
  
Naomi swam up to her. "What are you thinking about?" she asked, folding her arms on the ledge, propping herself up. "You all right?"  
  
"Fine." Emily smiled at Naomi. "Just thinking about you."  
  
"Oh," Naomi said. "I like the sound of that."  
  
She pushed herself up and Emily leaned down just enough for their lips to brush against each other. Naomi smiled, eyes closed, and then climbed out of the lake, dripping wet. She reached for her shirt, shrugging it on and doing up some of the button. She kept her skirt off, though, leaving it discarded to the side. Emily watched the water drip from Naomi's hair, roll down her cheeks, neck. Naomi's shirt clung to her damp skin, accentuating the curves of her body. Emily reached forward and stroked along the the side of Naomi's leg, tracing the curve of her calf. Emily had never imagined that someone's skin could be so soft.  
  
Naomi stretched and sat down next to Emily, pushing her wet hair back away from her face. She smiled. "What?" she asked, after a moment, staring at Emily with cool blue-gray eyes. They looked like the color of dove feathers, almost, Emily thought, they were so pale.   
  
"I just never thought I'd be here," Emily sighed, resting her head on Naomi's shoulder while Naomi's arm slipped around her waist, pulling her in close. "I mean, with you. It feels like a dream. It  _is_  a dream. If you were really you, you wouldn't want to do this with me," she added quietly, after a minute. "Before the spell, I was just some girl. You didn't even know that girl. The real you is so different."  
  
"Hey," Naomi said, putting two fingers under Emily's chin and lifting her head up until their eyes met. "I  _am_  real," she said, with such strong conviction that it broke Emily's heart. "This is who I am, Emily. This is who I always was. It was only today when I really saw myself for the first time."  
  
Emily kissed her.  
  
It was nice and slow and sweet, the way she'd always imagined kissing Naomi. She'd dreamt of a thousand kisses before yesterday and none of them were as lovely as the real ones. Naomi's hands were in Emily's hair and Emily thought, for a second, that maybe it didn't matter if this was all because of the spell. Maybe a part of Naomi, the  _real_  Naomi, did feel the same way about Emily. It was a wild, impossible thought, but Emily allowed to hope, just for a small moment.  
  
Naomi's hands fell to Emily's shoulders, then lower still, gently cupping Emily's breasts through her blouse; Emily sighed into the kiss, lying back on the ground and pulling Naomi on top of her. Naomi pulled away for a moment, trailing kisses down the length of Emily's neck, and Emily could feel her smiling as she worked one hand up underneath Naomi's shirt.   
  
"Here," Naomi said, sitting up a little and quickly undoing the buttons on her top. "Let me."  
  
"You're gorgeous," Emily sighed, reaching up to tuck a strand of damp blond hair behind Naomi's hair. And she  _was_  gorgeous, especially in the early mid-morning sunlight, with the light reflecting off the lake water just so, casting a bright golden glow over everything. Emily was certain that she'd never seen anything quite so lovely before.  
  
Naomi's smile softened some, as she shrugged off her top and reached around to undo her bra, letting it slide slowly down her arms before dropping it to the side. She caught Emily's hand, kissing her knuckles, and brought it up to her chest, covering her breast with Emily's hand. Emily's breath hitched as she felt the nipple harden under her palm.  
  
Naomi moaned softly and leaned back, pushing into the touch as Emily brought her other hand up, squeezing gently. She pushed herself up into more of a sitting position, pressing a kiss to the space between Naomi's breasts. She watched Naomi's eyes flutter closed, Naomi straddling her and rocking back slowly, grinding their hips together.   
  
They took their time making love.  
  
Emily came with Naomi beside her, her thumb on Emily's clit and two fingers pushing inside her, slow and gentle. She leaned down to kiss Emily as her hips jerked up to meet Naomi's hand; Naomi tasted like spring water and smoke; her skin smelled of wet grass and sweat. Emily pressed Naomi back to the ground with one hand, the other slipping down between her thighs, a new wave of desire licking across her belly at the wetness that coated her fingertips.  
  
"You really are beautiful," Emily murmured, kissing Naomi once more before sliding down her body and pressing light, open-mouthed kisses along the inside of Naomi's thigh, loving the delicious way Naomi twisted and arched beneath her touch. She made Naomi come with her mouth on Naomi, hands gripping Naomi's thighs with wet fingers and Naomi's hands tangled in her hair, silently urging her on.  
  
Naomi let out a shaky laugh after a few moments, Emily shifting up to kiss her, fingers still working loose, light circles around Naomi's clit to bring her down.   
  
"Alright?" Emily asked.  
  
"Better than that," Naomi said, cupping Emily's cheek with one hand and gazing up at her with a look of pure adoration. "You?"  
  
Emily just grinned and kissed the bridge of Naomi's nose, grabbing Naomi's hand and pulling it down lower.  
  
  
;;  
  
  
Later, they redressed, after spending the afternoon dozing and waking up intermittently to make love or sometimes just to kiss, Naomi's nose bumping against her as they leaned in, laughing, Emily's hands tangling in Naomi's soft blonde hair, while Naomi's thumb stroked along the curve of Emily's hip, her touch so light and gentle that Emily thought she may well dissolve into molecules.  
  
It was evening as they sat by the edge of the lake, their feet in the water, their fingers interlaced, Emily's head on Naomi's shoulder.  
  
There was a soft sound of footsteps behind them. Emily turned slightly to see Ms Tebbit leaning against one of the trees, with a sad smile on her face, dressed in a long, pale gray dress, her small white flower tucked into her hair, a bright red-gold color in contrast.  
  
"Emily," she said. "It's time now to set things right."  
  
"No," Emily said, pulling away from Naomi and standing up to face Ms Tebbit. "No, it isn't. I won't. I haven't had enough time yet."  
  
"The will of man is by his reason sway'd," Ms Tebbit said.  
  
Emily frowned. "And so far blameless proves my enterprise, that I have anointed an Athenian's eyes," she said, the words spilling out of her mouth before she could even think about what she was saying. "And so far am I glad it so did sort, as this their jangling I esteem a sport."  
  
Ms Tebbit sighed, lacing her fingers together and resting her hands in front of her. "Think of your friends. Your family. Think of all the people you've changed tonight. It's time to fix things now."  
  
"No!" Emily said angrily, pulling Naomi up and to her, wrapping her arms around Naomi's waist and hugging her tightly.   
  
"The will of man is by his reason sway'd," Ms Tebbit said again, taking a step towards them. "Hath such force and blessed power. And then you will her charmed eye release, and all things shall be peace. Emily," she said, in a softer voice. "If you really loved Naomi, you would let her be as she really is."  
  
Emily could feel the sting of tears in her eyes and she blinked hard, willing them not to fall. Ms Tebbit was right. She  _knew_  Ms Tebbit was right. But with Naomi here, her arms around Emily, Emily didn't want to let her go. She thought about all the times that she had dreamed of Naomi falling in love with her, of holding her hand, of kissing her until they were both drowsy with sleep and lust. This Naomi, the one enchanted, would always want to be with Emily. The real Naomi never would.  
  
But she had fallen in love with the real Naomi. And no matter how hard she wished that Naomi's feelings were genuine, no matter how much she wanted to not undo the spell, she also knew in her heart was that this was not the way things were ever meant to be.  
  
She stepped up on tiptoe and gave Naomi one last, final kiss.  
  
Pulling away from Naomi, she said, resigned, "Take comfort, she no more shall see my face." She paused, glancing over at Naomi, meeting her eyes. She reached out and brushed the hair out of Naomi's eyes. "Whom I do love and will do to my death, be as thou wast wont to be."  
  
Ms Tebbit smiled. "I have a device to make all well. Here," she took the flower from her hair and handed it to Emily. "Crush this herb into the lover's eyes, whose liquor hath this virtuous property to take from thence all error with their might and make their eyeballs roll with wonted sight. When they next wake, all this derision shall seem a dream and fruitless vision."  
  
Emily held the flower tentatively in her hand, nodding.  
  
"Don't haste, get to the play tonight," Ms Tebbit said, turning to go. "And with some luck there, all things shall be right."  
  
"I swear to thee by Cupid's strongest bow, by all the vows that ever men have broke," Emily bit her lip, pausing. Then, "I'll be there."  
  
  
;;  
  
  
It looked as though the whole school had showed up, as well as the parents. Peering through a crack in the curtains backstage, Emily saw the hall lined with people and her mum and dad sitting a few rows from the front of the stage. James was there too, looking cross that he'd been brought along, but Emily's dad looked pleased to be there. He was looking over the small playbook with a slight grin on his face. Emily's mum kept glancing over at Dora, who was shooting her very obvious looks of adoration, while her husband seemed to be trying to get her to stop.  
  
"Hey," Naomi said beside Emily, dressed in her costume. Her skin was glittering slightly in the result, Katie's personal contribution to the whole cast's stage make-up. "You nervous?"  
  
"A little," Emily said, longing to reach forward and take Naomi's hand in hers. "I love you," she said quietly, staring into Naomi's clear blue eyes. "I just want you to know."  
  
Naomi smiled. "And I love you too."  
  
"Yeah," Emily sighed with a sinking heart.  
  
Ms Tebbit came in and announced that the play was going to be starting in five minutes. Emily took a deep breath, composing herself. This wasn't going to be easy, not at all. She hated the thought of this evening, after the play was finished. When everything would be back to normal and she would return to the gay loser that she'd been before all this. Before the spell, before Naomi fell in love with her, before the impossible became possible. A part of her didn't want to give all that up, but a bigger part of her knew it was the right thing to do.  
  
Katie had always tried to force her to fancy blokes instead of girls. It wouldn't be fair to make Naomi love her if that wasn't who she really was. Besides, she told herself, as the lights dimmed and then went out all together, the low roar of the crowd outside faded into silence. Besides, there were always other girls she could fall in love with.  
  
The play went smoothly; despite everything that had happened, it seemed as though it had only made Emily's schoolmates more eager to do a good job with their performance. The spell to reverse the love spell's work had not yet been cast, but still, with every line she spoke, every stage exit, Emily felt Naomi's love slipping away from her, little by little. She wished the end would never come, but with a sigh, entered for the play's climax.  
  
It was time to gather all the mixed up lovers and return them to their normal selves.  
  
"Follow my voice: we'll try no manhood here," she recited, climbing up on one of the set rocks and leaning against a tree, hidden by the low branches.  
  
Naomi entered a second later, as Lysander, pretending to look for Emily. "He goes before me and still dares me on: when I come where he calls, then he is gone. The villain is much lighter-heel'd than I: I follow'd fast, but faster he did fly. That fallen am I in dark uneven way, and here will rest me." She sighed and lay down on the ground, beneath the tree. "Come, thou gentle day! For if but once thou show me thy grey light, I'll find Demetrius and revenge this spite."  
  
Emily slipped around to the other side of the tree, leaning on one of the branches. "Ho, ho, ho! Coward, why comest thou not?" she asked, cueing Sophia as Demetrius on stage.  
  
"Abide me, if thou darest; for well I wot," Sophia said. "Thou runn'st before me, shifting every place and darest not stand, nor look me in the face. Where art thou now?"  
  
"Come hither: I am here." Emily grinned, revealing herself to Sophia from behind the tree before darting away again.  
  
"Nay, then, thou mock'st me," Sophia said, chasing after her. "Thou shalt buy this dear, if ever I thy face by daylight see: now, go thy way. Faintness constraineth me to measure out my length on this cold bed." She gave up the chase, settling down beneath the tree beside Naomi with a stifled yawn. "By day's approach look to be visited."  
  
It was now Katie's turn to enter, reciting Helena's lines. "O weary night, O long and tedious night, abate thy hour! Shine comforts from the east, that I may back to Athens by daylight, from these that my poor company detest: and sleep, that sometimes shuts up sorrow's eye, steal me awhile from mine own company."  
  
She curled up on the other side of Naomi, looping an arm around her waist, eyes fluttering closed.  
  
Emily crouched on the rock above them, gazing down at the sleeping players. "Yet but three? Come one more; Two of both kinds make up four." She nodded off stage to Kelly Parker, who grinned and wandered out onto stage, looking lost. Emily smiled, "Ah, here she comes, curst and sad: Cupid is a knavish lad, thus to make poor females mad."  
  
"Oh, never so weary, never so in woe," Kelly said, putting her hand to her head, pushing the hair back from her face. She stumbled a few feet and then collapsed to her knees underneath the tree, to where Katie, Sophia, and Naomi lay. "Bedabbled with the dew and torn with briers, I can no further crawl, no further go; my legs can keep no pace with my desires. Here will I rest me till the break of day. Heavens shield Lysander, if they mean a fray!"  
  
It was time.  
  
Emily took a breath, steeling herself, then jumped to the ground, circling the sleeping lovers. She took the flower that Ms Tebbit had given her, holding it gentle in her hand. She crouched down to where Naomi lay, fighting against herself. She reached out and gently stroked Naomi's hair, touching her hand one last time. "I'll apply to your eye, gentle lover, remedy."  
  
She held the flower over Naomi and the other girls faces, splashing the juice into their eyes. "When thou wakest, thou takest true delight in the sight of thy former lady's eye: and the country proverb known, that every man should take his own. In your waking shall be shown: Jack shall have Jill; nought shall go ill; the man shall have his mare again, and all shall be well."  
  
Emily held her breath.  
  
It began to rain.  
  
Soft and light, it fell from the rafters above the stage; Emily looked up to see what was causing it, but the lights from the stage were too bright. She winced and looked away as the girls on stage began to stir as though they had really been asleep. They pushed themselves up into sitting positions, rubbing at their eyes. When Naomi opened her eyes and looked at Emily, Emily did not see the same love and adoration that had been there before.  
  
She felt like crying. Shooting a forced smile, she exited backstage, wishing she could be any place but here. As the lovers said their final lines, stumbling off stage one by one with surprised grins, Ms Tebbit gave Emily a gentle push back towards the stage.  
  
"Go on," she said, with an encouraging smile. "It's time to fly."  
  
Emily walked onto stage, gazing out at the audience before her. She looked at her parents, who were watching her raptly. Even James had a look of wonderment on his face. It felt to Emily as if the whole audience was holding their breaths, just waiting for her to speak.  
  
"If we shadows have offended," she said, walking to the edge of the stage, "Think but this, and all is mended: that you have but slumber'd here while these visions did appear. And this weak and idle theme, no more yielding but a dream."   
  
She sat down, legs swinging off the edge. She could only make out the faces in the front rows; the rest were cloaked in darkness. "Gentles, do not reprehend," she went on, extending her arms forward, palms up. "If you pardon, we will mend. And, as I am an honest Puck, if we have unearned luck now to scape the serpent's tongue, we will make amends ere long; else the Puck a liar call."  
  
Jumping up, Emily motioned towards the rest of the cast, which were slowly making their way on stage for the final scene, some of their hands already linked for bows. She grinned at the audiences, gesturing towards the rest of her classmates. "So, good night unto you all. Give me your hands, if we be friends, and Robin shall restore amends."  
  
There was a pause, as she finished. And then the audience erupted in applause. Emily smiled and took a step back, allowing the minor players to move forward to the front of the stage, linking hands and taking a bow. Emily watched as each row of players went to the stage's edge, until it was her turn. The others turned to her with outstretched arms, ushering her to the front.  
  
Emily's heart was beating double time, as if she'd just run a marathon. She put one arm in front of her and one against her back and took a bow. When she looked up, she was surprised to see the audience getting their feet, one by one -- she was even more surprised to see her mum and dad beaming at her, clapping the hardest out of everyone. Emily couldn't remember the last time she'd seen her parents this happy and for the first time, she  _knew_  she'd done the right thing.  
  
"You did well, Emily." Ms Tebbit came up to her backstage, putting a hand on Emily's shoulder. "Very impressive indeed."  
  
Emily managed a weak smile. The giddiness from the play's reception was already beginning to wear off and she thought of Naomi, who had run off to talk to her hockey friends as soon as the curtain had fallen on the final bows. She hadn't even glanced in Emily's direction.   
  
"Thanks," she said. "I've got to get changed; my parents are waiting outside to talk to me, I think."  
  
Ms Tebbit smiled. "Go on, then."  
  
Emily passed Effy and Cook by the stairs to the upstairs dressing room. Cook had his arm slung around Effy's shoulder and was playing with a strand of her dark hair, curling it around a finger. His face lit up when he saw Emily. "Emilio man! Excellent job tonight. I don't quite get all that Shakespearean shit to be honest, but you did a bang up job. Loved me all the girlie stuff too, might I add, don't suppose any of them birds would be willing to -- "  
  
"Cook," Effy interrupted, with a roll of her eyes. "Shut up."  
  
He held up his hands. "Yeah, all right. I'll be outside babes."  
  
They watched him go, Effy with a kind of smile on her face that Emily had never seen before.  
  
"You were good," Effy said, after a minute, reaching into her pocket for a pack of fags and her lighter. Emily saw the  _No Smoking_  sign right beside Effy's head and chuckled, grinning as Effy lit up, inhaling sharply. "So what about Naomi, then?" she asked, her eyes searching Emily's face.  
  
"What about her?"  
  
"I still say you should go for it," Effy said, exhaling two thin bluish streams of smoke through her nose. "Like I've said, she fancies you."  
  
Emily picked at a bit of glitter on her sleeve. "Effy, you know that isn't true."  
  
Effy shrugged. "If you say so." She winked at Emily before brushing past her, heading outside to where Cook was waiting.   
  
Everyone had already changed, Emily saw, trudging upstairs to the dressing room on top of the back of the stage. Most of the costumes were hung up, but some were draped over chairs or lying on the floor, which was littered with spots of glitter and powder. The make-up tables were in disarray, covered in nail varnish bottles, lipstick cases -- among other things. It was quiet, the sound of conversation from downstairs and outside just a vague murmur up here.  
  
With a sigh, Emily sat down at one of the vanity tables, reaching for the face wipes to wash all her makeup off. She scrubbed until her face was shiny and pink. She looked at herself in the mirror, tossing away the wipe into the rubbish bin and pulling her hair out of its tight bun. She shook her head, her hair falling down her shoulders in gentle waves, sweeping her fringe to the side with her hand.  
  
Her thoughts, as always, turned to Naomi.   
  
Naomi, who had held her hand at the carnival, who had kissed her with a gentleness that Emily didn't think was possible. Naomi, who had made love to her by the lake, her pale skin almost glowing the the afternoon sun, her hair like a bright gold halo around her head.  
  
That Naomi, the one who had done those things, was gone now. And all Emily had left was memories of a Naomi that had never really existed in the first place. She was just a dream, a fancy. None of it had been real. And the real Naomi would go on with her life completely oblivious. They would return to the roles they had always played.  
  
She put her face in her hands, willing herself not to cry.  
  
"Hey," a voice said suddenly from behind her, as two arms slipped around Emily's waist. Emily looked up as Naomi leaned in and pressed a kiss against her cheek, hugging her tightly, her breath warm on the back of Emily's neck. "You were unbelievable tonight."  
  
"But," Emily asked, standing up and turning in Naomi's arms, staring at her incredulously. "What are you doing? Don't you feel -- "  
  
Naomi smiled at her, leaning down to kiss the tip of Emily's nose. "I feel like myself," she said.  
  
"Come on you losers," Katie said, bounding up the steps, already out of costume and tugging Freddie along behind her. "Ems," she said, as she pulled out her phone, grinning and texting furiously while Freddie stood there with an amused look on his face. "Ems, come on. There's an after party going on tonight, yeah? I don't want to be late because of you two. You can go be gay on your own time."  
  
"Katie -- " Emily started, rolling her eyes, but Naomi just laughed and said, "All right, fuck off now, Katie, yeah? We'll catch up."  
  
Katie looked up briefly from her phone. "Yeah, cool," she said, with a slight shrug. "I'll see you there babes," she gave Emily a small wave before heading back downstairs, Freddie in tow. He gave them a look that said,  _yeah, well, whatever_  and flashed Emily a bright grin just before his head disappeared behind the staircase.  
  
Emily reached up, brushing a strand of hair out of Naomi's eyes. "I can't believe it," she said, after a long pause. "Is this . . . is this real?"  
  
"I certainly hope so," Naomi said with a soft smile, her hands settling on Emily's hips. "I think we've had enough of make-believe to last us a lifetime, don't you think?"  
  
"Yeah," Emily murmured, wrapping her arms around Naomi's neck and pulling her down for a kiss. "I do."


End file.
